Monday, September 30, 2013
Guy is not a very good listener, and really not the best at obeying. He does what ever he gets into his head, without thinking about what the consequences will be, or how his actions will affect those around him. Tonight, he and Spike, were supposed to be going to bed. Now unless someone knows something I don't know, all that I can do is get them into their bedroom, and make them stay there. I can't make not play, or go to sleep. Sure I can threaten, and cajole. I can bribe, and plead, but really when they go to sleep is their decision. They tend to rough house, and wrestle, instead of settling down. I really don't know what to do about it, if there is anything that I can do.
Tonight, according to them, they were climbing on Guy's bed, and jumping off onto the floor. Then the bed frame came apart with one bolt missing, and the other bent totally out of shape. Needless to say he doesn't get to sleep in a bed tonight. Spike's bed is still in there, and from the sound of things, they might be repeating their actions. But short of taking away his bed too, what do you do?
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Well the hubs bought me a bike. And I rode it. And I didn't crash. And it was actually fun, in a scary kind of way. I will tackle this fear, one step at a time. Or maybe that should be one ride at a time.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
That kind of thing. So I tried to put that into practice with Aurora today. When she helped me put Spike's socks on, I thanked her for getting the socks, and trying to get them on him. And when she did all of her jobs on her own, with me just telling her what to do, but not going around with her and helping her do them, I told her "Good job, you did all your jobs by yourself. Doesn't that make you feel good!" (Or something like that.)
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Aurora was very insistent that she was not going to wear a jacket this morning. All I did was hand it to her, and then she started screaming at me that she's not wearing a jacket today! She then threw her jacket onto the sidewalk, where I picked it up and tucked it into the bottom of the stroller. I didn't tell her she needed to wear it, but she screamed and kicked at me all the way to preschool. Then when we got there, she refused to stay. She was screaming and crying when I left. When she got home later, had her lunch, and wanted to play the computer (her normal routine), I told her no. I told her I didn't like the way she acted this morning, she wasn't nice to Mommy or her teachers. And because she acted like that she doesn't get to play the computer. She then cried and screamed at me, about how she is "GOING TO PLAY THE COMPUTER TODAY!" I just got myself some lunch, rotated the wash, and folded clothes. I would occasionally acknowledge her feelings, but I never gave in.
Then this afternoon, Cinderella wasn't feeling well, and that might have been part of it. But we went to pick up the Hubs from work, and he wanted to go to a local dinosaur museum. However both Cinderella and Guy had ignored me telling them to get their shoes, and got in the car with bare feet. Needless to say, we couldn't go to the museum. Cinderella screamed at us the whole way home, about how unfair we were that we wouldn't go home, get her shoes and then go back to the museum. When we got to our neighborhood, I had gotten tired of her screaming, so she and the hubs got out of the car, and walked the rest of the way home.
I am not sure if this is all due to the changes in parenting that I am trying to make, or if there are other factors involved here. But lets just say it was kind of crazy.
Monday, September 23, 2013
This week we have been implementing a new system of parenting. I have been reading "Have a New Kid By Friday" by Dr. Kevin Leman. We started trying to implement ideas from this book yesterday, and life has been crazy. I have been amazed at times as things I wasn't sure would work did, and we have had some serious drama as kids are testing new limits. He claims it can get pretty bad for a few days but then gets better. I am looking forward to the better part.
Sunday, September 22, 2013
This has gotten me thinking, what do I want out of a birthday. A birthday is an anniversary of ones birth. 364 days of the year, are just regular days, but one day out of the year is your birthday. I think that most people like to feel special (extra special) once in a while. And a birthday is an opportunity for such things. I don't think (at my age) it is about presents. Presents are just more stuff. Sure I can appreciate them, but they aren't what matters most. What matters to me, is that people took the time to think about me, and let me know that they care.
In this day and age of technology, this often happens with a simple message on Facebook. Now I am not against such messages. I think they have their place, but sometimes I think we take the convenience for granted, and don't deliver messages in the most meaningful way. A few years ago, on my birthday I spent quite a bit of time visiting some people, one of the people that was there, said very few words to me the whole time I was there. Later when I got home, and was checking my Facebook page I noticed a "Happy Birthday" message from this person written during the time we were spending together. I appreciated this message, but it would haven meant a lot more to me, if they had wished me Happy Birthday in person, while I was there.
A phone call, or a visit, where applicable mean more to me than a little message on the computer screen. I understand that not everyone has the time, or availability to do those kinds of things, and so the Facebook message can be meaningful.
I guess what I want to communicate most in this post, is are you as a person, really taking the time to let the people you care about let them know you do, on their birthday, or any other day for that matter? Or do you simply take 5 seconds to write a text or message on Facebook, and then forget about them for another year?
Saturday, September 21, 2013
Aurora and Guy together are trouble. I don't know how to getthem to obey. When they are together, and I ask one to do something, the other encourages disobedience.
Today I was trying so hard to be nice. I kept asking them to do their jobs, and they kept ignoring me and doing whatever they pleased. I gave them consequences. I made them take a timeout, I told them they didn't get lunch, until the living room was clean, no results they just kept ignoring me. Finally I l9st it, and yelled at them. They finally started obeying, but I felt awful for giving in and yelling. I felt like crying. I want my kids to listen and obey, but I don't want to yell. Is that asking too much?
Friday, September 20, 2013
This morning I mopped the floor, and made pumpkin bread. Albeit my bread didn't turn out, but I made it. Then after lunch I sat down at the computer to write down some ideas that have been rolling around in my head. Just a little bit of time for me. Most of my days are not like that, but maybe I can make Friday's like that. It is worth a try.
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Last week after I made her lunch one day, Aurora said to me, "Thanks, your a cute little mom."
Another day she told me I am the best mom ever.
Tonight Aurora and Guy were having pretend phone conversations with some of their cousins. (The cousins were just being imagined.) And one child would be talking on the phone, and the other would come up and try and yell over the other one into the phone, to the cousin "they" were talking to. The response would then be, "I haven't shut it down yet, your talking to the wrong person." I never thought of ending a phone call as shutting it down.
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
I am working on getting my kitchen back into order after painting. It can get discouraging if I let myself think about all I still need to do, but I am making progress. That is the part I need to focus on.
Monday, September 16, 2013
Today I was thinking about it, and realized that I don't always do the best job of showing appreciation to others for what they do. And if I don't show it, where are my children supposed to learn it from? So I am trying to do a better job of showing appreciation, and saying thank you. I know it won't be easy, but I am going to do it.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
I then kindly helped them off their swings and into the house. I then asked them to get in their PJ's. They told me "no!" then proceeded to go downstairs. I had a few things that I had brought in from the yard that I needed to take care of, so I took care of those items and then went to find the kids. They were down hiding in Aurora's room, trying to block the door so that I couldn't come it. I got the door open, found Guy, put him over my shoulder and started carrying him up the stairs. The hubs saw me at this point and took Guy to finish getting PJ's on. I then went back down, cornered Aurora and helped her into her PJ's.
Then as I was going back upstairs, I passed the mess of the playroom. Not only was it a mess of toys, but they had also dumped out my laundry basket, so there were socks all over the floor, and someone had left uncapped glitter glue on the floor. Lets just say, the laundry that had been clean now has glitter glue on it. And my laundry basket was filled with toys. By this point I felt like if I asked them to clean up they would just tell me no again, and I didn't want to deal with that. So I just went and grabbed a few garbage bags, went back down and started putting the toys in. I got the toys all cleaned up. The glitter glue and markers that were left on the floor are thrown away. I am not sure what will happen to all of those toys yet.
The kids did ask what they can do to get their toys back. I told them if they keep the family room, and their bedrooms clean for a week, they can have some toys back. We will see how this goes.
Saturday, September 14, 2013
Today, with lots and lots and lots of help from the hubs, and one of our neighbors I painted the kitchen. OK to be honest, the neighbor did most of it, then the hubs, and I only really painted behind the refrigerator. Most of the other time I was cleaning, getting food, and taking care of Scooter and occasionally Spike.
I hope to post more pictures of the kitchen in a future post.
Friday, September 13, 2013
A few years ago we decided to try to take the kids on an outing, just one kid and mom and dad, for their birthday. We haven't always been very good at getting it done close to their birthday, but we try to do it anyway.
Tonight we took Aurora out for her evening out. Scooter came along just like he does on all our dates right now, but other than him it was just her, and mom and dad.
We took her out to dinner, to a museum, and then a play. I think she enjoyed it, but had a hard time with the play keeping her interest. She kept asking if it was the end yet.
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Today there was a preschool field trip to a pet store. I have to admit puppies and kittens sure are cute. But they can sure be expensive! Cinderella wants a chihuahua. Those dogs were like $500-$600 dollars, just for the dog. I know it costs money to have a pet, but I really don't want to pay that much for a pet that my kids will get tired of, and then I will have to take care of it.
I told Cinderella that if she can keep her room clean for 30 days in a row she can have a pet. I figure if she can stay motivated that long we stand a better chance of her actually staying motivated to take care of the pet.
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
I believe that is true, but I am having a hard time figuring out when to take care of myself. How do you do it?
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
I then decided to experiment, and went for the rest of the evening speaking in a quiet voice. Guy often frustrates me, by getting involved in something and then tuning me out. I often end up yelling just his name in trying to get his attention, then I feel really frustrated. Well this evening, he was playing down stairs, and I just stood at the top of the stairs and said his name in a quiet voice. I may have had to say his name 2 or 3 times, but he responded a lot quicker than he does when I yell. Also there were only a few times during the evening that he had to ask me what I said. Most of the time he heard me well, and responded in a positive way.
This isn't to say that he didn't whine when I told him it was time for bed. He still did. But overall, he went to bed without a fight. So did Aurora. I felt like our evening was a much positive experience overall, and I think a big part of it, was me speaking in a soft voice instead of yelling.
Monday, September 9, 2013
Afterward she came and visited me. I really enjoyed that too. I don't get to see a lot of my mom, and so I relish the opportunities I do get. Aurora, Spike, Scooter and I took my mom out to lunch at the cafe that is at the Hubs work. It was a nice visit.
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Saturday, September 7, 2013
Friday, September 6, 2013
Right now I am frustrated with contagious diseases. So as I posted yesterday, both Cinderella and I have been diagnosed with strep throat. Neither of us are contagious any more, but that doesn't mean that others in my family don't have it, and are contagious. And we have no way of knowing, except waiting.
This means we can't really get out and be around other people.
Right now this frustrates me because tomorrow the girls in my family are getting together to spend the day shopping. Now I am not a big shopper, but I haven't gotten the kids school clothes yet, and I don't have very many opportunities to get a break from my kids, and hang out with the girls. I was really looking forward to tomorrow.
But I have a sister who just had a baby via c-section, and her 2 year old is at my parents house right now. I don't want to get her sixk, and have her take it home to her mom and brother. I also have a pregnant sister-in-law, who will be going, and I don't want ro get her sick either. (Not that I want to get anyone sick, those people are just more susceptible rigt now.)
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Turns out she did. Then I got to wondering. I haven't been feeling the best lately (yesterday and today), and I kind of have a sore throat, so I went to my Dr. to check and make sure if I had it or not. Turns out I do to. Isn't that exciting? I get to be mom, with a sore throat, and headache, but at least I know why, and hopefully will soon be feeling better.
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
It wore me out, but we made it through the day, not using diapers, until I put him to bed.
Scooter is a crazy kid, when he wants to get somewhere, at least in his room. I changed his diaper in there this afternoon, and left him on the floor while I went to throw away the diaper and wash my hands. By the time I got back to him, he had somehow scooted into his closet, and barricaded himself in there.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
The hubs has a pedometer which I put on today before walking Aurora to preschool. I clocked how far I walked, and then I left it on, while I went about my daily chores.
I made sure that I took a route to the preschool and back that covered at least a mile. It went slightly over. Then at the end of the day, well at least when I took off the pedometer, ( I still did a bunch of stuff after that), it said 2 .10 miles. Not bad.
Monday, September 2, 2013
We started heading in, and were stopped by some people coming out. They said the pool was going to close in 15 min. but we were welcome to use what was left on their punch pass if we still wanted to go in. So we took them up on it and swam for 15 min. It was short, but fun.
Sunday, September 1, 2013
Today we started a habit jar. I took an old candle jar, and we cleaned out the leftover wax. Then we each picked a habit we would like to work on.
The hubs and I are going to try to not yell. Cinderella wants to practice the piano each day. Guy wants to try to not chew on his shirt. Aurora wants to work on personal hygiene. And Spike just needs to try to use the bathroom.
Each day as we say nightly family prayers, we will follow up, and everyone who worked on their habit that day (practiced a good habit or avoided a bad habit), gets to put a marble in the jar. When we fill the jar, we get a reward as a family.