"How am I supposed to sleep with a crying child?"

So Cinderella and Guy share a bedroom.  They have bunk beds.  Cinderella is on the top, Guy is on the bottom.  Cinderella knows that because she has school in the morning, that she needs sleep, and most nights wants to sleep.  Guy, however has an aversion to sleep.  Every night, it is a battle to get him to go to bed.  He will play with toys, he will read books, he will follow you around the house, he will keep getting out of bed and turning on the light, etc.  As you may imagine, this makes it difficult for Cinderella to sleep, and as an end result causes conflict.

The other night, after my husband put them to bed, I heard Guy crying.  I asked my husband if he knew what the matter was, and he told me it was that Guy didn't want to go to bed.  No surprise there.  Shortly there after, Cinderella came and found us, and asked Daddy if he could keep Guy up for a while so she could get to sleep.  Daddy then responded that he had tried.  Guy had asked for his horse, Daddy had given it to him, and then Guy went back down stairs crying.   I told Cinderella to just ignore him and try to go to sleep.  She then turned to us and simply asked, "How am I supposed to sleep with a crying child?"

My baby who doesn't sleep. At least not when she is supposed to.

So Sleeping Beauty, loves to sleep. During the day. At night time, she would rather be awake. I know this is common for babies, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with.

The other day she went 7 hours in the morning between feedings. But at night she goes 3-4. And she isn't necessarily asleep between those feedings. Some might say, don't let her go that long during the day. Well the idea is good. It just doesn't necessarily apply. If I try to feed her as often during the day as she eats at night, she will often just nurse for maybe 5 min, then look at me and smile. Hence, she isn't really that hungry.

At night I feed her and put her back in bed. She sometimes will sleep three or four hours. But often she sleeps about an hour, and then she is awake, and crying. So I find myself stumbling out of bed to give her back her pacifier. This will sometimes coax her back to sleep. Sometimes. More often than not it seems she spits it out 5 min later, and I have to go put it back in. Hence I don't get much sleep.

Last night my husband suggested that we just let her cry it out, and see if she would put herself back to sleep. So we tried. She screamed for at least 2 hours, until it was time to eat again, and then she only calmed down when I fed her. And of course by that time it was time for me to get up for the day. So I am thinking that at least at this point in the game, crying it out isn't going to work for her.

So do any of you have any suggestions? I am so exhausted. But for me to sleep, she needs to sleep.

Sleep

So ever since Guy was born we had him share a room with Cinderella. There were times that it was a little inconvenient, and one would wake the other up in the night. But for the most part they adjusted and we had little problem. Until now.

We have moved out of our apartment, and are staying with my parents. Cinderella is on a twin size bed, that is against the wall. And Guy is on a trundle bed, on it's lowest setting, right next to the twin. So part of the problem is probably proximity.

Every night since we got here, I have had to put the kids to bed at different times from each other, because if I don't Guy won't let Cinderella go to sleep. The first night we were here, Cinderella came out to tell me that Guy was crying to keep her awake, and then he would grab her arm and pull her from her bed, to his, to the floor. So that night I started keeping Guy up until Cinderella was asleep. Then I would put him to bed, and she would just sleep through his crying. Well I kept doing this every night, because when ever I tried to put them both down at the same time, they wouldn't go to sleep.

The down side is that Guy isn't getting enough sleep. He is striking on naps. Plus my nephew needs that room to take his naps, so I don't feel right putting Guy down when he probably won't sleep, and keeping my nephew, who would most likely sleep, up. He stays up late, and is up early in the morning. So tonight I am trying a different approach. I put Guy to bed, and put Cinderella in my bed. After Guy settles down, I'll try and get Cinderella moved to her bed. Hopefully this will get them both down at a decent time. I just hope that it works and that I can get Cinderella moved.

Only time will tell.

So here is my question. We haven't found a house yet. But I want to get a house that has at least 2 other bedrooms on the same floor as the master. Who shares a room with who? If you were me would you put Cinderella and Guy together and leave Sleeping Beauty on her own? Or put the girls together, and leave Guy by himself? Or put Guy and Sleeping Beauty together and let Cinderella have her own room?

Sleepless nights

So as I mentioned in a previous post Guy has been sick lately, and it has been disrupting sleep. Pretty much all of the members of our family have had their sleep interrupted. But last night was the worst. Hopefully it gets better soon.

We woke up to Guy screaming and coughing about 12:00 or so. Actually I think I woke up, I don't think Daddy was awake, because he said something about ice cream, so I think he was still dreaming. :)

I went and got Guy, as has become my nightly routine. I picked him up, got his pacifier and blanket, and took him to the rocking chair. We sat down and he kept screaming, he started thrashing around on my lap, and didn't want sit down. I tried standing up. He didn't want to stand. I tried walking with him. He didn't want to walk. He just kept screaming and kicking. Finally I was just so frustrated I was crying. I went and woke Daddy up, and told him I couldn't calm Guy down, it was his turn.

He took Guy in his arms, and rocked him there on the bed. I just stood there and watched. I wasn't sure I wanted to get back on the bed, because then I felt like I would be pushing all the responsibility off onto him, but also I didn't want to rock the bed at all and stir Guy again. I was sobbing, feeling so bad that my son was suffering so much, but wouldn't do what he could to calm down. It was so frustrating. I wanted him to calm down, but I couldn't make him. Finally Daddy got him to calm down, and got him back in bed.

About an hour later, I woke up to the same thing. I felt completely useless, so I sent Daddy in there to begin with. This time Daddy couldn't get him to settle down either. So I tried again. I couldn't get him to settle down. I was so frustrated, I couldn't figure out what to do. So I put him in the middle of our bed and tried to ignore him. He continued to scream and thrash around. The whole while I had been praying, and finally I had an idea. This night was the first night we hadn't given him Tylenol before he went to bed, because he didn't have a fever. I thought, maybe he is hurting somehow, and if we give him some Tylenol he will be able to settle down. So I suggested it, and we gave him some. He instantaneously settled down. So I don't know if he was hurting, and knew the Tylenol would help him feel better so he calmed down. Or if he just decided he felt better because he got some meds.

Anyway, I hope he does better tonight. Currently he is sitting on my lap trying to type on the keyboard, instead of going to bed. But he and Cinderella were keeping each other up, so I'm keeping him up till she goes to sleep, and then we will see what happens. I'm definitely ready to get more sleep.

Beep

Our alarm clock goes off to a CD every morning, and when you turn it off it makes a "beep". Ever since we moved Guy to a bed, he gets up every morning pretty close to when his Daddy does. I've wondered if he listens for the alarm. My question was answered.

Saturday night about 1:30, I was awakened to hear Guy's little footsteps running into our room. Then I heard a groan, and turned to see him climbing up on the bed right over Daddy. It was clear from the look on Daddy's face, that he had not heard the footsteps. Guy ended up in the middle of our bed. I picked him up, and felt that his face and hands were cold. I asked him if he was cold in his bed. He said "cold bed". So I put him in our bed for a few minutes to warm up. He laid down next to me, and stayed that way for about a minute. Then he sat up, and pointed to the alarm clock and said "beep."

I told him, "No, Guy it isn't time to get up yet." He then started to sing the ABC's in his Guy fashion. He doesn't say the actual letters, but you can tell what he is singing. He stopped right about where G should be and said "Beep, beep" pointing at the alarm clock. I thought that was so funny. He knew the alarm clock played music then said "beep" so he was singing a song and then stopping mid song, like the alarm clock does, and said "beep".

I told Daddy, that Guy was ready to get up, and what Guy had done. Daddy looked at the clock, and told Guy he needed to go back to bed. So he took him and put him in his bed, gave him his pacifier and blankets, and shut the door. Thankfully we didn't hear from him for the rest of the night.

E is for energetic

Which is something that I am not lately. I have been so tired. My son has been teething and even though he is handling it without much difficulty, it does wake him up in the night. I have been blessed in that he has been sleeping through the night pretty consistently since he was about a month old, so I shouldn't complain about having to get up 5 times during the night to give him back his plug. But hey this too shall pass.
My daughter is quite energetic. And she loves playgrounds. Today I was going visiting teaching, and when I got to the apartment I was visiting, there was a playground right by where I parked my car. As soon as she got out the car she ran for the playground. I had to go and retrieve her, and she wasn't too happy with me. She decided to make it hard for me to climb the stairs I guess, I was holding her hand, and she latched onto my leg with her other arm, and legs so I was carrying her up the stairs with me. It definitely gives me a work out. Then when we got home, she held my hand because we were in a parking lot, and then told me to run. She wanted to run through the parking lot. So we did. Then she wanted to run after we got into our apartment. I had to put my foot down there however.
Where do young children get all their energy. If I could keep up with her, I bet she would run all day long.
My baby turned 6 months old last week, and he can now sit up and crawl. He has been scooting around for probably 2 months. My kids just like to go. I guess kids need to have energy so that they can keep us adults moving.
So what keeps you moving? Are your kids energetic or are they more calm?

L is for learning to pick my battles

OK so today was a hard day, and by the end of the day we were all tired.
My husband made a dinner of homemade macaroni and cheese, which I thought was very good. Anyway it was served just before 7 pm, which is about 1- 1 1/2 hrs later than we usually eat. My daughter was very excited for dinner, but when she was served something that looked a lot different than the usual out of a box stuff. Well she pitched a fit. She wanted the macaroni and cheese that is "in the door" or behind the door in the pantry. When she refused to be pacified I told her that if she would eat this macaroni and cheese tomorrow we could have the one that is "in the door" for lunch. So she grudgingly ate about 2 bites, and said she was done. She was now ready for the macaroni that is "in the door". Well we decided to not give in on this one.
I could tell she was tired, and so even though it was an hour before her usual bedtime I decided to get her ready for bed. Well she got even more upset when I tried to take off her dress. I managed to get it off and the pajamas on, but they didn't stay on. I told her to stay in her room till she calmed down and left the room.
It was at this point that I realized that it had become a power struggle. And I think when it gets to this point, both parties are the looser. I wasn't happy because she was screaming, and she wasn't happy because she had to be in her PJ's. So when she came out a minuet later, still crying, I asked her what she needed. She told me the "flower dress", which was her description of the dress she was wearing today. So I had my husband get the dress out of the hamper while I tried to calm her down. We put it back on her, and she told us she was ready to "take a nap".
So we gave up our regular night time routine tonight, let her go to bed in her dress, didn't read scriptures or say prayers, or even brush teeth. But it is now about 7:40 and she is asleep. Hopefully she will stay out for the night. I think because I was willing to give in, and let her "win", this time I am a winner too.
So how do you handle power struggles. Have you learned to pick your battles, or are you still in the learning process like me?

W is for weaning

So in my family right now there seems to be a lot of weaning going on. And before you get the wrong idea, no I am not weaning my 5 month old from his bottle yet, unless you count the fact that we have started rice cereal.
Most of the weaning involves my toddler. Another way to say it is we are trying to break habits, or one case, she is breaking a habit or routine.
So I will start with what she is doing. She has recently decided that she doesn't need naps anymore. This is difficult for me, because I still need naps, and I can't take one if she doesn't. She is down to about 2 naps a week. And don't get me wrong I totally appreciate those two naps. In fact I couldn't be writing this right now if she wasn't taking one of her two naps for this week, right now.
We are also in the process of weaning her from her "plug" or pacifier. This is one that is hard for me, and I have tried different ways different times and have yet to succeed. However right now we are trying a replacement method. She uses her plug as an item of comfort, so we are trying to displace that affection and comfort to another item. We bought her two stuffed bears that are identical. One is only for when she is taking a nap or going to bed, the times that she is allowed her plug. The other one is for when we are in the car, a time when she seeks comfort in asking for fruit snacks (another habit we are trying to break at the moment.) I'm hoping she will develop an attachment to the bear and then we can gradually remove the plugs and fruit snacks.
The last item that we are trying to wean right now is movies. If you read my "M is for movies" post you noticed that she watches a lot of movies. I decided she watches too many movies. I decided that instead of a movie a day (on weekdays) I would cut it down to one movie per week, plus special occasions. What I didn't count on were withdrawal symptoms. The first day that I tried no movies, I found myself craving TV, and movies. I think my daughter was having similar problems. She told me probably 6-10 times that day that she "needed to watch a movie". I didn't give in, however I decided that going from a movie a day to a movie a week in one shot was maybe too crazy of a move. So I have altered my plan for the moment. Right now I am trying to cut it down to a movie every other day on weekdays and none on weekends unless it was a special occasion. Once we have adapted to that schedule then maybe it will be twice a week, and then down to once a week.
So I don't know if it is my timing is bad, or that I am trying to do too much at one time, but my daughter has also lately become incredibly clingy. She has always been an outgoing independent child, but now if I go somewhere, even somewhere that is familiar and the people are familiar, she doesn't leave my side for very long. And she is clingy at home too. She always seems to need me right there doing what she is doing, and need my very attention. If I am on the floor paying attention to the baby, she will climb on my back, if I am at the computer she comes and pulls at my arm. If I am in the kitchen, she is underfoot constantly.
So what I want to ask all of you is, do you have any advice for a struggling parent in this situation. Am I doing too much at once do I need to cut back on all that is being cut out of her life at one time? Is there some way that I can pay her attention, and have her take some "own" time too?

N is for Naps

So have you ever noticed that once we reach adulthood we tend to appreciate sleep more? (OK maybe that isn't true about all adults and maybe some people appreciate sleep all of their lives). With my kids when they were really small, like under 2 months old, they tended to fall asleep pretty easily, there were maybe a few tricks that I needed to pull; feed them, rock them, hold them, but when they were tired they did a pretty good job of just falling asleep. My son more so than my daughter.
But he is getting out of that stage now. In fact at night time lately he has been so tired that he will just yell and cry until he finally falls asleep. And he is getting to be that way at nap time.
My daughter, has never been a great sleeper, but she is getting to be more so now. She has had a hard time taking naps since she was about a year old. But finally now on most days she will tell me after lunch that it is nap time, ask for her plug and at least stay in her room and look at books if not take a nap. And I am so grateful that she has gotten to this point.
I just wish my son would take a nap at the same time as his sister, but that has yet to be a regular occurrence.
But I guess I should just be grateful that he does take naps and so does she, and make the best of the situation.

By the way just a postscript, my children's doctor redeemed himself a little bit this last week, he actually took the time to look at the chart before he came in. Maybe it won't be so bad after all.