OK so today was a hard day, and by the end of the day we were all tired.
My husband made a dinner of homemade macaroni and cheese, which I thought was very good. Anyway it was served just before 7 pm, which is about 1- 1 1/2 hrs later than we usually eat. My daughter was very excited for dinner, but when she was served something that looked a lot different than the usual out of a box stuff. Well she pitched a fit. She wanted the macaroni and cheese that is "in the door" or behind the door in the pantry. When she refused to be pacified I told her that if she would eat this macaroni and cheese tomorrow we could have the one that is "in the door" for lunch. So she grudgingly ate about 2 bites, and said she was done. She was now ready for the macaroni that is "in the door". Well we decided to not give in on this one.
I could tell she was tired, and so even though it was an hour before her usual bedtime I decided to get her ready for bed. Well she got even more upset when I tried to take off her dress. I managed to get it off and the pajamas on, but they didn't stay on. I told her to stay in her room till she calmed down and left the room.
It was at this point that I realized that it had become a power struggle. And I think when it gets to this point, both parties are the looser. I wasn't happy because she was screaming, and she wasn't happy because she had to be in her PJ's. So when she came out a minuet later, still crying, I asked her what she needed. She told me the "flower dress", which was her description of the dress she was wearing today. So I had my husband get the dress out of the hamper while I tried to calm her down. We put it back on her, and she told us she was ready to "take a nap".
So we gave up our regular night time routine tonight, let her go to bed in her dress, didn't read scriptures or say prayers, or even brush teeth. But it is now about 7:40 and she is asleep. Hopefully she will stay out for the night. I think because I was willing to give in, and let her "win", this time I am a winner too.
So how do you handle power struggles. Have you learned to pick your battles, or are you still in the learning process like me?
1 comment:
Well sometimes I do compromise... it sounds ok for her to wear her clothes to bed, who cares. If you would have said you gave in to the other mac n cheese, i would have told her no. My on throws tantrums and he goes to time out, or if its bed time and he starts throwing a tantrum I go lay with him till he stops crying so I can explain it to him... by that time he could care less, and goes to sleep.
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